Revenge, With a Smile!
by Hincaru
Summary: Hanataro is seriously getting tired of getting beat up by squad 11, Who wouldn't be, right? Well now Hanataro knows how to beat them. NOW it's time for some sweet sweet revenge! -ONESHOT- My first BLEACH story. Please review. :3


**Disclaimer:**I do not own BLEACH, but that would be sweetastic.

**_Revenge With a Smile:_**

* * *

Hanataro looked distressed, and a little humiliated as Unohana healed his wounds. They were from his most recent run in with squad 11. His eyes stared at the ground as he spoke.

"I'm so tired of them ganging up on me!" Hanataro said despratly. "One of them is bad enough, but they like making me look like a weakling."

"Are you?" Unohana asked quietly.

"Yes." Hanataro replied, hanging his head.

Unohana sighed. That wasn't the answer she was looking for.

"What makes them stronger then you?" Unohana asked calmly.

"Everything." Hanataro sounded defeated.

"Surely there is something about you that is stronger then them." She reassured her ally.

Hanataro thought for a moment before replying.

"No." he hung his head again. "Nothing. They are all bigger and stronger and more ruthless then I am."

"Are you the quickest?" She asked.

"No, Ikkaku is faster. I know because he caught me when I ran away."

"Are you better with kido?" She asked, searching for anything.

"No, Yumichika is way better then me." Hanataro sighed, loseing faith.

"Surely you are the smartest." She asked with a small sigh.

He was silent for a long moment. "Yeah, I suppose I am." He smirked a little.

"Well then." She smiled gently. "Use that to your advantage next time." She finished healing him, stood up and laid a comferting hand on top of Hanataro's head before walking away.

Hanataro sat there, thinking for a long moment.

_So there is something that I am better at._ He thought to himself. _So I have a chance of beating squad 11 at SOMETHING. But how can I go about it._

Hanataro went back to his room and pondered the rest for a couple of hours before he came up with a master plan.

"This is PERFECT!!" he said, before running out in the darkness. Prepared to set his master plan into motion.

--

It was early in the morning and squad 11 was taking a break from their training. Kenpachi was bored, waiting for his subordinates to fight again. Yachiru was sitting on his shoulders.

"You know what would be great, Kenny?" she asked happily wrapping her arms around his head.

He didn't reply, he just waited for her answer.

"If Ichi came back!!" she sounded happy.

Kenpachi grinned. "I'd get him this time! He will never beat me again."

"Then you're in luck." a small voice rang out. Kenpachi and Yachiru turned around and saw Unohana standing there stoically.

"What do you mean?" Kenpachi asked.

"I was just coming to tell you that Ichigo Kurosaki has returned to the soul society." Unohana lied.

Kenpachi didn't hesitate. He stood to run off but stopped and face his squad. "Find him." he said simply before running off to find the unsuspecting Kurosaki.

Unohana didn't say anything else, she just left.

Ikkaku and Yumichika exchanged glances.

"Well... I'll go this way." Ikkaku said with a smirk, walking north.

Yumichika started to follow Ikkaku, but then recalled that they were supposed to split up, so he went north east instead.

--

Yumichika was bored as he wandered around the soul society. He was starring at the sky, not actually interested in finding Ichigo.

He sighed deeply.

"There's no point in this." he told himself. "Kenpachi is going to find him first, this is just a walk for me." he sighed again and flipped his perfect hair.

He looked around and noticed something strange. "Those human kids seemed pretty popular... so why is everyone walking around like normal." he pondered this for a long moment. This was his first mistake.

You see beautiful people can't think and look where they're going at the same time. He didn't even notice the hole a few feet in front of him.

One step.

Two step.

Three step.

He fell.

He tumbled down the hill rather quickly, unable to stop himself. He didn't bother trying to stop himself, instead he covered his face, unable to bear the idea of not being beautiful. He stopped abruptly, so much so that he was shocked. He moved his face and found himself stuck in a strange substance. He pressed the palms of his hands down into the goo only to find that his clothes were stuck. He used all of his strength to push himself up, only to find that his legs were stuck as well.

"What IS this stuff?" he asked disgusted. He tried to stand up but his legs remained stuck. He fell face first into the goo.

There was a muffled scream as he lifted his face out and took a deep breath. The sticky resin was all over his face.

"GAH!! What the hell? My beautiful face!"

He pushed himself up onto his knees again and put his hands on his ruined face. When he tried to move his hands he found they were stuck to his face.

He almost started crying when suddenly he saw Hanataro.

"Ha-anata-aro..." He sounded desprate. "Help me." he pleaded as he pulled his hands off of his face, strings of goo still connecting them.

Hanataro smirked and pulled a red piece of plastic from his pocket. He put it to his mouth and started to blow it up. It was a balloon.

"Wh-at are you doing?" Yumichika looked worried.

"Oh," Hanataro walked over in front of Yumichika. "nothing." Hanataro tied the balloon and stared down at Yumichika.

"What are you doing? Hanataro! Help me!" he pleaded again.

Hanataro gave him a sinister look as he lifted the balloon over Yumichika's head, slowly lowered it and sat it lightly on his still perfect hair. And viciously started rubbing it back and forth.

"NOOOO!!!" Yumichika was defeated.

Hanataro dropped the balloon in the goo he hand spread across the grass, and laughed maniacally. Yumichika's hair was standing straight out. He slowly moved his hands to his dark hair, forgetting that his hands were sticky. And then he fell on his face again. There was another muffled cry for help.

"Now if you'll excuse me I should _really_be getting to Ikkaku."

And with that Hanataro ran off with a smile on his face, the taste of revenge still sweet on his tongue.

--

Ikkaku was still walking around at twilight trying to find the Ichigo that wasn't really there. He would have given up an hour ago, but he had seen Kenpachi, who was being led around by Yachiru, and they told him to keep going. He yawned loudly as he walked. He was tired, and when he's tired his mind doesn't work right.

He does things without thinking first.

As he walked Ikkaku saw something that wasn't familiar to him. On the side of one of the buildings there was a large black hole and a sign that read "CAUTION: Do not put anything of importance into this hole."

Ikkaku stared at it for a long time. He examined the hole, it was pitch black. He couldn't see anything. He was staring very intently, but despite the serious look on his face, he really wasn't thinking anything inelligent. He actually wasn't thinking anything at all.

Slowly Ikkaku raised his hand, his eyes still on the black hole. He stood there with his hand by his head for a steady thirty seconds, having a staring contest with a black hole. Then as quick as he could he shoved his hand into the darkness.

Suddenly a chain wrapped tightly around Ikkaku's wrist, too quick for him to get away.

"What the-?" he tried to pull his hand out, but by pulling on the chain he triggered another chain to shoot out of the hole and wrap around Ikkaku pulling him against the wall.

"Shit!" he tried to pull away from the wall, but this only triggered another chain to wrap around his remaining wrist. He was completely confined to the brick wall now. Suddenly there was a bright light on Ikkaku's face, he squinted his eyes through the light, all he could see were soul reapers staring at him.

He could recognize three of the faces he saw. There was Kenpachi, Yachiru, and Hanataro.

"Wow, Baldly your head is blinding me!!" Yachiru said, squinting her eyes.

Kenpachi stared at him deeply confused. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Come on man! Help me down!!" Ikkaku yelled, struggling against the chains. He hated it when people stared at his bald head, and right now thanks to the light shining on it, everyone's attention was on it.

"You got up there, can't you get yourself down?" Kenpachi asked.

"Just get me down from here!!" Ikkaku yelled again.

Kenpachi grinned.

"Are we still looking for Ichi?" Yachiru asked. "Or are we staying here to stare at Baldy's shiny head?"

"Ichigo!"

"Let's go that way!" Yachiru pointed in the same direction they just came from, but Kenpachi listened and ran off.

"Oh come on!!" Ikkaku almost whined. Then he turned and looked at Hanataro, who was laughing. "Hey.. hey Hanataro. You'll help me right, you're a nice guy!"

Hanataro just laughed louder and turned his back on Ikkaku walking slowly away.

"What they HELL! I swear I'm gonna get you Hanataro!!" Ikkaku tried to threaten him.

Hanataro continued walking away, slowly.

"Come on!!" Ikkaku yanked around violently before giving up and just hanging there for a minute. Then he started yanking around again.

That will be going on _all_ night.

--

Hanataro made his way back to his squad leader's room and knocked lightly. She answered the door and invited him in, and they sat at her table sitting across from each other. Hanataro was smiling triumphantly.

"You look much happier then yesterday." Unohana smiled lighlty at him.

"I am much happier!" Hanataro smirked. "I took your advice Unohana. I used my brains to outsmart Kenpachi, Ikkaku, and Yumichika!"

"That's wonderful Hanataro." Unohana kept her smile. "What did you do?"

Hanataro told her the whole story. He told her about when he went home and devised the plan. He told her about how he set everything up and it all went _exactly_as he planned it. He told her about how he tricked Kenpachi and Yachiru into waisting their day running around searching for Ichigo, how he left Yumichika stuck in goo at the bottom of a ditch, and how he left Ikkaku chained to a wall with a light shining on his shiny head.

Unohana laughed at his crazy anticts and smiled approvingly at him.

"So what is your plan?" She asked.

"What do you mean?" Hanataro asked, interrupting his own laughter.

"You know, for tomorrow."

Hanataro stared at her clueless.

"When they all realize what has happened. When Yumichika gets free from the glue and gets Ikkaku down off of that wall and the two of them break the news to Kenpachi that it was all a trick. What are you going to do."

Hanataro stared at her blankly. Then he looked depressed. And then he looked completely horrified with tears in his eyes.

"Oh my goodness... they're going to kill me!!"

* * *

I hope you enjoyed it. :D

I'm thinking about writing a revenge chapter for the members of squad 11.  
Poor poor little Hanataro.  
But somewhere deep inside our heart every one prayed he would get a little revenge, right? :D  
I would love it if you would** review** if you liked it.

Thank you for reading!!

**_-Hincaru_**


End file.
